3 Simple Ways to Calm Your Nervous System When Stress Takes Over

There are times in life when being 'on' can feel like the only way forward. We push for the next promotion, manage competing demands, care for others or navigate change. In my own years of striving for the next goal, the next role and the next achievement, I've come to see how often we do this while our nervous system stays on high alert. Learning to recognise the signals can help us pause, reset and respond differently.

🧠 When your brain thinks you're under threat

Think about the last time you were in a difficult conversation. Perhaps someone challenged your work, you received unexpected feedback, or a situation suddenly felt beyond your control.

You may have noticed your shoulders tighten, your heart beat faster, your breathing become shallower or your thoughts become less clear.

That isn't you losing control. Your brain and body are responding to a perceived threat.

At the heart of this response is the amygdala, a small structure deep within the brain that plays an important role in detecting potential threat. It is constantly processing information and assessing: Am I safe? Is there a risk here?

And it can respond incredibly quickly — sometimes before our conscious thinking has caught up.

When the brain perceives threat, the fight, flight or freeze response can be activated. Your heart rate and breathing increase, preparing your body to respond. Energy and blood flow are prioritised towards the systems that can help you act quickly, rather than towards the slower, more complex processes involved in reflection and reasoning.

This is where the prefrontal cortex becomes particularly relevant. Located at the front of the brain, it plays an important role in executive functions such as reasoning, planning, perspective-taking, impulse control and decision-making.

When we're calm, we have greater access to this part of our brain.

When we're under significant stress, our ability to think clearly, see perspective and choose our response can become more difficult. It's why you might leave a difficult meeting thinking, "Why didn't I say that?" Or find yourself reacting emotionally when, with a little more space, you would have responded very differently.

Your brain isn't broken. Your nervous system is doing its job.

The opportunity is to become better at recognising when your system has shifted into protection mode — and to have some simple tools available to help it settle. Here's where you can start.

Three simple ways to help calm your nervous system

✍️ 1. Journal

Journaling can be a powerful way to slow racing thoughts. The physical act of writing makes us slow down, find the words and begin to organise what is happening in our minds.

Putting a name to a feeling — I'm worried. I'm angry. I feel overwhelmed — can also create some distance from it and help us make sense of what we're experiencing.

You don't need to write anything profound. Free-flow journaling can be enough to create space to think more clearly.

👤 2. Notice your posture

Our physical response to stress can happen almost without us noticing. Shoulders round forward. Our head drops. We become smaller and our breathing can become restricted.

The next time you catch yourself doing this, try the opposite: sit or stand a little taller, gently draw your shoulders back, lift your gaze and create some space across your chest and abdomen.

You aren't trying to force yourself to feel calm. You're simply changing the physical cues you're giving your body and creating a little more space to breathe.

🫁 3. Come back to your breath

Breathwork is something I use regularly through yoga, but it doesn't need to involve a yoga mat or a meditation cushion. All it takes is a few quiet breaths, wherever you are.

In a moment of stress, try breathing gently in for a count of three, followed by a slightly longer exhale of four.

Inhale: 1–2–3. Exhale: 1–2–3–4.

A longer, slower exhale can support the body's relaxation response. And because you can do it quietly, it's something you can use almost anywhere.

Looking after your nervous system, not just calming it

For me, this is about more than what we do when we're already overwhelmed.

Calming the nervous system isn't about removing ambition, challenge or difficult emotions. It's about developing the awareness to recognise when we're moving into protection mode — and having the tools to help ourselves return to a place where we can think, connect and respond with greater choice.

This is central to the way I work through coaching 🗣️, reflexology 👣 and yoga 🧘 : creating space for people to reconnect with themselves, support their wellbeing and ultimately, thrive.